Know What You Need

Summary

Summarized wtih ChatGPT

Knowing what you need makes knowing what you want much easier.

It is often said about successful people that they “know exactly what they want.” I’m sure this is true, because in our modern culture, where we are constantly made aware of new choices and possibilities, knowing what you truly want is not nearly as easy as it sounds.

The more we know about the lives of others, the more we are influenced by them. That can be a good thing, if what we know is a matter of character and experience. But when we are voyeurs (and exhibitionists) about things, our desires are easily manipulated. In a culture as materialistic as ours, this is rarely a good thing.

It takes some discipline to change this. It sometimes means not looking, or being disconnected. The less I know about what other people do, the less those choices can influence mine. I find that helpful, because I am as influenceable as anyone else.

But this still leaves you with the question of what do you want? I think this is a question much easier to answer if you have already figured out what you need.

Needs and wants, of course, are often difficult to distinguish. For instance, we all need food, and we all have preferences for what kind of food we eat. The difference between eating to stay alive and eating to thrive is exactly that spectrum of need to want. But since we all eventually get full, it’s a much better one, than, say, the same need-to-want spectrum for just about anything else we might buy — clothing, a car, or a house.

I like to maintain a list of needs. It looks a lot like a budget, but my primary purpose in maintaining it is not to keep me from overspending. It’s to keep me from over-wanting. When I know what I need, the question becomes not just “what do I want?” but “do I want more than this?”

Below are my categories. The last one is particularly important, because if it is not a thing that supports one of the above, it’s a want, not a need. This is a big category; it contains ever…

Highlights from Article

The less I know about what other people do, the less those choices can influence mine. I find that helpful, because I am as influenceable as anyone else.

• Knowing about what else is out there makes you focus on that instead of knowing what you actually want.

I think this is a question much easier to answer if you have already figured out what you need.

But I also remember, in the early days of my adult life, when not being able to fully meet my own needs created a daily anxiety that was still not great enough to sublimate externally influenced desires. That’s how much power even an ambient awareness of things and the other people who want them can have over you.

• Even when you know what you need, there’s a pull to get stuff you don’t.

All material owns to the authors, of course. If I’m highlighting or writing notes on this, I mostly likely recommend reading the original article, of course.

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